(S.Cahn & J. Van Hausen)

Here is a verse unlike any verse
To a song that you've never heard
It deals with the subject that I and the authors agree
Is at best absurd
Love is a bore
Love is a ball game without a score
Love is a sail boat without a sail
The lock on the candy store
Asparagus without the hollandaise
Plus all the petty laughs
In Tennesse Williams' plays
I used to love it but now it's a drag
Love is a flag pole without a flag
Love is the mailman without the mail
A comic without a gag
A soap-opera plot and lots lots more
But mainly I mean love is a bore

It's I'll-call-you-tomorrow
It's a phone that never rings
It's a sack full of sorrow
Or a ride on angel's wings
So just remember the next time you saw
Love is an exit without a door
But if you're in love you'll ignore
All the things that I've said here before

And you'll pray that your love
Whatever he does
Will come back and be
The bore that he was
Before!