Remember when you ran away
And I got on my knees and begged you
Not to go because I'd go berserk?

WELL,

You left me anyhow and
Then the days got worse and worse
And now you see I've gone completely
out of my mind,

AND

[chorus 1]
They're coming to take me away,
Haha, they're coming to take me away,
Ho ho, hee hee, ha ha,
To the funny farm
Where Life is Beautiful all the time
And I'll be happy to see
Those Nice Young Men
In their Clean White Coats
And they're coming to take me AWAY,
HA HAAAAA

You thought it was a joke,
and so you LAUGHED, YOU LAUGHED
When I had said that losing you
Would make me flip my lid,

RIGHT?

You know you laughed.
I HEARD you laugh, you laughed
And laughed and laughed
And then you left,
And now you know I'm Utterly Mad

AND

[chorus 2]
They're coming to take me away,
Haha, they're coming to take me away,
Ho ho, hee hee, ha ha,
To the Happy Home with Trees and Flowers
And Chirping Birds and basket weavers
Who sit and smile and
Twiddle their thumbs and toes
And they're coming to Take me Away,
HAHAAAAAAAAA

I cooked your food,
I cleaned your house,
And this is how you pay me back
For all my kind unselfish loving deeds

HUH?

Well, you just wait,
They'll find you yet,
And when they do, they'll put you in
the ASPCA, you mangy MUTT,

AND

(chorus 1)
(chorus 2)
(chorus 1 trailing into mumbles in the distance)