I know I'm unhappy
I know things aren't right
for instance last week
I got drunk everynight
I know that I'm angry
I know I'm afraid
I rarely make love
I mostly get laid
and I know I'm unhealthy
no Dr. could doubt
my dreams are all bad
my hairs falling out

when you get the blues and you want to shoot yourself in the head
it's allright it's allright go ahead
do the monkey do the pony do the slop do the hulahoop twist
cut your throat cut your throat cut your wrists
when your tire of worldy toil shuffle off this mortal coil
turn your body back to soil
it's ok it's ok
when you get hungup hang yourself up by your neck
what the hell what the hell what the heck

stomp on the moon and spit in the ocean
razzamatazz and I love you
holy smokes atlantic ocean
you can do anything that you want to do
you can sing four songs
you dance ten dances
eat twelve candies
drink eight beers
break two rules
take six chances
laugh nine laughs
shed three tears
eat that watermelon
drink that moonshine
shes the lady and your the lord
or mail pouch that you will
keep you in line
drive all over in her grandaddy's ford
small talk big talk hugs and kisses
strum a little number on that red guitar
if you want to charm the bonnet off your misses
go out and catch a firefly stick him in a jar
take off her clothes
and throw her in the river
wash her body and stick it in the sun
give that gal everything you can give her
you can give her the bullets
if you can give her the gun
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Thanks to (Timothy L. Taranto) for correcting these lyrics. May 2, 2008