I give my woman half my money at the general store
I said, "Now buy a little groceries, and don't spend no more."
But she gave ten dollars for a ten cent hat
And bought some store bought cat food for a mean eyed cat.

When I give her ten more dollars for a one way ticket
She was mad as she could be
Then I bet ten more that if she ever left
She'd come a-crawlin' back to me
When I woke up this mornin' and I turned my head
There wasn't a cotton pickin' thing on her side of the bed
I found a little old note where her head belonged
It said, "Dear John, honey, baby, I'm long gone."

When I heard a whistle blowin', and the big wheels a-turnin'
I was scared as I could be I put on my overalls and
I headed to town Gonna bring her back with me.

I asked the man down at the station if he'd seen her there
I told him all about her pretty eyes and long, blonde hair
He spit his tobacco, said, "I'll be dad blamed......
I believe I did see her leavin' on the east bound train."

I bought a round trip ticket on the east bound train
I was broke as I could be
But when I come back, gotta buy another ticket
Gotta bring her back with me.

Well, I got off the train somewhere in Arkansas
And I worked up the guts to call my Mother-In-Law
She said, "I'll tell you where she is, if you act right."
"She's workin' four to twelve at Trucker's World tonight."

When I walked in she saw me, and she took off her apron
And she grabbed her goin' home hat
She bought a ticket with her tips
And now we're curled up on the
sofa, me and her....and that mean eyed cat