Wake up Major
And stitch on your hat
You fell outta bed
Then you landed in the cash

So what’s in your diary today?
Call on your main man
What can he do for you?
Hang out with stupid
So you can tell him what to do
Major this is your day

Living alone in a jar never gets you very far

He can read your mind
Make you feel alright
Sgt. Major knows what you want
Knows what you are
One day you’ll be a star
Yeah the major knows what you want

Take out your paper
Throw it away
Everything is useless
Ain’t got a lot to say
Major, this is your way

Major is drowning ‘cause he opened his mouth
He starts to explain it
But nothing’s coming out
Major, what can you say

Hope that you like who you are
Cause living alone in a jar never gets you very far

He can read your mind
Make you feel alright
Sgt. Major knows what you want
Knows what you are
One day you’ll be a star
Yeah the Major knows what you want

I know you think you made it
I know what I’m meant to say
But while you looked in the mirror
I was getting away
To you there is nothing to say

He can read your mind
Make you feel alright
Sgt. Major knows what you want
Knows what you are
One day you’ll be a star
Yeah the major knows what you want