See through cling film wraps her up tight
Motionless sections no longer able to fight
My doting wife I tried to please her
So I hacked her up and her in the freezer
I wouldn't let her leave me so she tried to strike out
I hit her with a hammer she was dead with one swift clout
I once used ice to gently tease her
Now it surrounds her in the freezer
Put next to lollies and packets of peas
No room in my fridge cos it's full of her (Barcardi) Breezers
I've had to keep her in the freezer

A freshly sharpened knife with a shiny blade
Holding the stump of her hand pretending to wave
Popped her eyes out and craved off her nose
Kept in a bag with her little fingers and toes
I'll eat her in a stew so she's always with me
My freezer's full of limb so there's plenty to eat

A bucket full of innards and slurry of waste
Placed in the fridge next to her smiling face
I've got my memories (I'm keeping her ring)
We had 10 good years before I done her in

Lie still my precious...

Cling film wraps her up tight
No longer able to fight
My wife, I tried to please her
I put her in the freezer
I wouldn't let her leave me
I hit her with a hammer
I used ice to tease her
Now it surrounds her in the freezer

I put her next to lollies and the packets of peas
With all frozen dinners placed precuriously by her knees
No room in my fridge cos it's full of her Barcardi Breezers
I've had to chop her up to fit her in the freezer

A freshly sharpened knife with a shiny blade
Holding the stump of her hand pretending to wave
Popped her eyes out and craved off her nose
Kept in a bag with her little fingers and toes
I'll eat her in a stew so she's always with me
My freezer's full of limb so there's plenty to eat

I can't fit her limbs in the fridge
I can't fit her dead limbs in the fridge