My name is Jon,
I am a loser, a microphone abuser.
And I've never ever ever ever ever been laid.
And I'm an asshole and a pussy,
But at least I'm not that emosideproject guy.

I just took a crap and the Jon came out.
I just took a crap and the Jon came out of my butt.

And he's a poop head,
I bet he doesn't get much head.
And he lays alone in his bed at night.
But so do I except I cry but I've got something in my eye
It must be the Jon but I don't know if Jons John is really long.

Someone call the cops cause Jon is soo hot.
Someone call the cops cause Jon is so not hot.

I still love him every day,
Even though he called me gay.
I still wrote him a song,
Even if he is a jerk sometimes.
I guess we all can be,
That's just reality.
Being really really mean to me,
Jon's being really mean to me.
But it's alright, it's alright.
Gonna keep on living through the night.
That's alright, it's alright.
Gonna keep singing all the night long.

Cause I just took a crap and Jon came out.