Army Lyrics

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well, I thought about the army
Dad said, "Son, you're fucking high"
and I thought,
"yeah, there's a first for everything"
so, I took my old man's advice
3 sad semesters
it was only 15 grand
spent in bed
I thought about the army
I dropped out and joined a band instead
grew a moustache and a mullet
got a job at Chick-fil-A
citing
"artistic differences"
the band broke up in May
and in June reformed without me
and they got a different name
I nuked another grandma's apple pie
and hung my head in shame, no...

I've been thinking a lot today
I've been thinking a lot today

oh, I think I'll write a screenplay
oh, I think I'll take it to L.A.
oh, I think I'll get it done yesterday
(oh, shit!)

in this time of introspection
on the eve of my election
I say to my reflection,
"God, please spare me more rejection!"
'cause my peers they criticize me
and my ex-wives all despise me
try to put it all behind me
but my redneck past is nipping at my heels (ha ha ha)

I've been thinking a lot today
I've been thinking a lot today
I've been thinking a lot today
I thought about the army

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Army Lyrics

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well, I thought about the army  
Dad said, "Son, you're fucking high"  
and I thought,  
"yeah, there's a first for everything"  
so, I took my old man's advice  
3 sad semesters  
it was only 15 grand  
spent in bed  
I thought about the army  
I dropped out and joined a band instead  
grew a moustache and a mullet  
got a job at Chick-fil-A  
citing  
"artistic differences"  
the band broke up in May  
and in June reformed without me  
and they got a different name  
I nuked another grandma's apple pie  
and hung my head in shame, no...  
  
I've been thinking a lot today  
I've been thinking a lot today  
  
oh, I think I'll write a screenplay  
oh, I think I'll take it to L.A.  
oh, I think I'll get it done yesterday  
(oh, shit!)  
  
in this time of introspection  
on the eve of my election  
I say to my reflection,  
"God, please spare me more rejection!"  
'cause my peers they criticize me  
and my ex-wives all despise me  
try to put it all behind me  
but my redneck past is nipping at my heels (ha ha ha)  
  
I've been thinking a lot today  
I've been thinking a lot today  
I've been thinking a lot today  
I thought about the army

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